When I'm around people, I'm always unconsciously staring at what they say and do.
If the other person doesn't look good, my first reaction is: did I do something wrong?
Then habitually take all the blame on yourself.
It seems to me that life is always gray and cloudy, and it's hard to see the sunny side.
Is this a psychological problem or not? Do I need to see a psychiatrist or get counseling?
Hello, friend!
Everyone's personality has its own shortcomings; some are naturally sensitive, while others are neurotic. But honestly, no personality is perfect.
The real world actually requires us to be keenly observant while not getting hurt easily by being too glassy-eyed. So yes, different personalities are useful in different scenarios.
As we experience more and more things, we slowly realize that sometimes we need to draw on the strengths of other personalities in order to better cope with life's challenges.
Psychologically, it is believed that being overly concerned about what others think is often related to low self-esteem, sensitivity, and a lack of self-acceptance, while deeper causes may be traced back to some traumatic experiences in one's family of origin or upbringing.
Care too much about what others think of you, the surface seems to be around others, but in the end it is actually a manifestation of "excessive self-focus".
Think about it, if you didn't care so much about yourself, how could you be so nervous about what others see?
Because you have your eyes all to yourself and live in a completely self-centered world, your energy, time and emotions are always being led by the little things that matter to you.
① Insist on self-growth
Insisting on reading and learning and improving yourself may not feel like a change in the short term, but the energy that builds up over time will be more than you can imagine.
It is you who reads and learns to grow. It is only through the accumulation of time that you can realize a qualitative leap. Because growth is what makes you truly confident!
②Learn to look at things rationally
Looking at a problem from a rational perspective is the key to resolving emotional distress. For example, if you go out wearing a dress that doesn't quite fit you, and a passerby glances at you. Sensitive you may feel that the other person is ridiculing your outfit, and your emotions will be messed up. But try to analyze objectively: passer-by A wearing clothes with holes, met passer-by B, B glanced at A. That's it. That's all, the rest is your own brain. If you can distinguish between facts and feelings, your emotions will be less likely to get out of control.
There's no one else out there but you.
In "Meet Your Unknown Self", Devin Cheung said that there is no one else out there but you.
We are always worried that others think we have a poor character, ordinary looks, or lack of ability, and we always pick ourselves up by other people's standards, and as a result, nothing we do feels right.
But when you really face the reality, you realize that there aren't really many people who really pay attention to you and care about you!
Really, there's no one else out there but you.
