How to get out of a suicidal haze with the double whammy of depression and loss

I had suicidal thoughts because I had fallen out of love.

This may sound simple, but my relationship experience is actually quite convoluted and not one of those rash ideas that young people have on impulse.

The reason for the suicide was also related to my life's dilemma.

I really wanted to die and the specialist hospital diagnosed me with depression.

But I refused to take medication for it.

Every single moment, I couldn't get rid of these negative thoughts.

I want to end my life as quickly and decently as possible. What should I do?