After trying so many methods and still not being able to stop the internal struggle, how do I make myself stop? What does it take to really stop? I know those practices are wrong, but I just can't control them, neither can I move forward nor backward. It's like knowing there's a tiger in the mountains, but not being able to find a gentle way to treat myself. What should I do? Happiness and sadness are far away from me, trying again and again, losing to myself again and again. How many times do I have to relive the pain of the past before I can welcome a new life, gain freedom, and reconcile with myself? My heart is torn apart by all kinds of contradictory voices, broken beyond wholeness, like a broken cup that can no longer hold water. I can no longer feel life as a normal person, how can I build healthy relationships with others when such a self scares me? What reason is there to go on with such a broken life?
Hello my friend~ I can feel your inner pain and struggle, this deep loneliness and helplessness is truly heartbreaking. First of all, please remember that you are not alone, many people are going through similar emotional distress.
When faced with these complex emotions, it's important to start by acknowledging your feelings and giving yourself some understanding and compassion. The fact that you've tried so many ways and can't stop shows that you've put in a tremendous amount of effort. But when groping in the dark, sometimes you are not strong enough on your own and need outside support and professional guidance.
If you haven't tried it yet, it is highly recommended that you seek the help of a counselor or psychiatrist. They can provide a safe space for you to express your pain and use scientific methods to help you find a way out. Treatment may include cognitive-behavioral therapy, positive thinking exercises, or medication interventions, all of which can be effective in relieving anxiety and depression.
Also, setting small but doable goals works well. For example, take a ten-minute walk every day, read a few pages of a book, or have a short chat with a friend. Slowly building up these small accomplishments can help you regain a sense of control over your life.
Self-care doesn't happen overnight; it takes time and patience. In the process, allow yourself to make mistakes and don't be too hard on yourself. Every fall is an opportunity to grow and failure is part of learning.
Most importantly, despite feeling broken right now, believe that you still have the strength to rebuild your life. Even if there is darkness in front of you, if you keep moving forward, the light will always come. You deserve to be understood, to be loved, and to have a future full of hope and meaning~💞
