I don't usually have any particular experiences or health problems, such as mental illness or memory disorders.
When interacting with people, I always unconsciously say thank you, sorry and excuse me repeatedly, often repeating myself several times without realizing it (sometimes I forget after saying it), which tends to make others feel embarrassed. Although people around me have reminded me of this and I have tried to change it myself, it has not been effective.
Hello, Mr. Owner. I'm Whale Social Worker Niyetan.
After reading your sharing, I understand that you are accustomed to using words like thank you, sorry, and excuse me in interpersonal interactions, but repeating more than once without noticing it yourself bothers you quite a bit. On the one hand, the repetition of polite words is embarrassing; on the other hand, you want to change it after others remind you but you can't, which makes you anxious. A warm hug to you first!
First of all, it's safe to assume that you're a very polite person, which is actually a very good quality and shows respect for others. Being too polite is certainly not a bad thing! You can totally keep this habit in the future. I know you always say this because you're worried about influencing others, and you're afraid that your lack of politeness will make others uncomfortable or give you a bad impression, so you're strict with yourself. But you may be too serious about yourself, often repeating yourself, sometimes forgetting you said it, embarrassing people, and wanting to change but not being able to, which makes you conflicted. I know exactly how you feel.
I don't know if you're used to saying this on specific occasions, such as when asking for advice, or if it's true in all scenarios? If it's a specific occasion, then it's normal and appropriate, and you might just forget you said it before repeating it. At this point relax, don't worry too much about whether or not you said the polite word, and just focus on what's going on in the moment. Even if you forget to say it once in a while, it's okay, it won't affect how others see you, just relax. If you can't control what you say in any situation and it's causing a lot of distress in your life, you can also talk to a counselor. With their help and your own efforts, I believe you can handle this!
Best wishes (whale social worker 🐳)
