Oh, what a headache! My middle-schooler seems to have been affected by some bad habits lately, but I'm afraid that I'll hurt his feelings, so what should I do?
Hey, parents! When we find that our adolescent sons are being led astray by a bad influence, it is inevitable that we, as parents, will be anxious and even a bit overwhelmed.
This mood is too normal, after all, middle school children are in the critical period of growth, especially susceptible to classmates, the environment and even the influence of the network, a little inattentive to go astray.
Don't panic, here are a few tips to help your child get back on track without destroying the trusting relationship between parent and child.
The first step is to stabilize your mind and not blow up. When you see that your child has a problem, don't scold him, it will only make him more rebellious and farther away from you. Why don't you talk to him calmly and listen to what he has in mind?
Step 2: Open up the conversation. Find a suitable time, such as after dinner walk, gently open the topic. You could say something like this, "Honey, mommy noticed some changes in you lately, and I'm a little worried, so let's talk about it, okay?"
By opening up like this, the child will feel that you care about him and are not out to pick a fight.
The third step is to dig into the root of the problem. Listen more when you talk, and find out why he is being "led astray". Did he make a bad friend? Or is it because of the pressure of studying and wanting to escape? Only to find the crux of the problem, in order to prescribe the right medicine.
The fourth step is to give some practical support. If it's a question of friends, you can quietly guide him to distinguish which friends are worth making; at the same time, encourage him to participate in basketball, painting classes and other such positive activities, to expand the healthy circle.
Don't forget, we have to be good role models ourselves. Children secretly learn what their parents say and do! Showing a positive outlook on life in general is much more effective than lecturing.
If the situation is serious, don't take it personally. Seek help from your school psychologist or a professional counselor who is experienced and can provide more scientific solutions.
