We're not officially boyfriend/girlfriend, he says he hasn't thought it through yet and is worried that if we get together it will be bad for me, like he might cheat on me or something.
In fact, I'm two years older than him, not as pretty on the outside as his ex-girlfriends, and can't wear makeup, and he seems to care about the outside world and thinks I'm no better than his former dates.
He's a bit macho and often makes me feel disrespectful to women when he talks, and when he's angry he says he's just joking, so I can't tell the difference between what's true and what's not.
He always spoke with a tone of contempt and I would get upset, if I didn't get his way he would get angry and curse and that hysterical look scared me.
But afterwards he would apologize in a nice manner and say that he didn't mean what he said before.
For example, the things he called me, mocked me, and belittled me, I kept in my mind and got sad when I thought about it, but he thought I was glassy-eyed.
Are we not on the same page? Is it necessary to continue?
There are happy moments with him, but really feel scared and careful to talk much.
I'm afraid of the way he explodes when he gets angry...but he always says the problem is me and now I'm confused and even feel like I have too many problems.
Hi, I can see from your description that you have happy moments when you're with him, but more often than not you're too careful to speak freely.
"30 year old woman, should this relationship continue? The title "Be careful when getting along" makes you feel that you are not getting the respect and love you deserve in this relationship? In fact, whether this relationship continues or not, the most important thing is to see how you feel.
There are several things to consider (but not limited to) in determining whether a relationship is worth continuing:
1. Do you feel comfortable in the relationship, are you able to express yourself freely, are you supported and nourished. Relationships are built for happiness, not pain, so you can gauge whether there is more pain or happiness and whether you get support and growth. This is very important.
2. The second point is often referred to as the three views: outlook on life, values, consumerism, three views can not be completely consistent, but generally should be similar, the two sides through communication can seek common ground while reserving differences, mutual respect, and differences can be sympathetic to each other.
3. Both parties have roughly the same family background and upbringing, or what is often referred to as a good match. Similar backgrounds can make each other more talkative and easier to understand each other.
4. You purposely marked 30 years old in your title, I wonder if you are pushing yourself because of age pressure. Life is your own and no one else can relate to how you feel, so please respect your feelings, after all you are only 30 and have a long future ahead of you. I wish you peace!
