I have a particularly hard time communicating with my coworkers at work. We were originally in the same department, and I thought we could discuss and solve things together, but I realized that the other person had completely different ideas. I'm a straightforward person, and sometimes an unintentional remark can make her angry, and she even retorts with a barbed tone, which is hard for me to bear. But for the sake of face and not wanting to fight in the office, I have to put up with it.
One time I just couldn't hold back and got into a huge fight with her, and then she came running to apologize afterwards, which I thought was pretty funny.
Today she spoke to me again in an aggressive tone, and once again I chose to tolerate it, but it was particularly uncomfortable.
I've been struggling with the question of whether I should be forthright and express my thoughts in the future, or continue to tolerate them. I don't want to be treated like a soft touch.
Now I have a particular aversion to this coworker, not so much the work stuff that counts, but mostly her attitude that irritates me.
Hi, friend! The communication challenges and mood swings you're experiencing in the workplace are actually experienced by many people. Friction between coworkers not only pulls down productivity, but also affects mental health, so it's super important to find ways to cope.
First of all, you mentioned that you have a blunt personality and that sometimes your unintentional comments can make people angry. This indicates a difference in your communication styles. Everyone has a different personality, and understanding and adapting to the other person's communication style is key. Try using softer language when expressing yourself, such as affirming before making suggestions, which is more likely to be accepted.
Learning to control your emotions is super critical. Staying calm and professional in the office can prevent conflict from escalating. When you feel on fire, take a few deep breaths and give yourself a few seconds to calm down. If you can't hold it in, walk away for a while to slow down and come back to deal with it.
Also, since she has apologized, it means she wants to improve the relationship as well. Why don't you find a relaxing occasion to talk openly about your feelings and listen to her ideas. Both parties can discuss how to adjust their communication style together, and the cooperation will be smoother. Remember to choose a quiet environment to make the conversation more sincere.
It's also important to adjust your mindset when dealing with a nasty coworker. Try to focus on the work itself rather than your personal emotions. Try to discover her strengths and reduce hostility. At the same time, developing some hobbies, such as sports or reading, can distract negative emotions and make life more fulfilling.
If none of these methods work and the work environment continues to deteriorate, even to the point of affecting your health, consider a change of position or career. After all, a harmonious work environment is vital to personal growth and well-being.
Communication in the workplace is an art, and with more practice, you'll get better at it.
