Hello, I'm 15 years old, recently there is a relationship problem want to talk to you: I like a boy, take the initiative to go after him, but after chasing him, but feel less like it, and even a little disgusted. This is especially similar to the description of sexual monogamy I read on Baidu before! Now I have a crush on another guy, but I'm so afraid of repeating the same mistake and hurting him. I feel like I'm quite a scumbag, but inside I just can't control my fear. What should I do? How can I cure this mentality?
Hello friends, I am the enthusiastic respondent of the lofty emotions, I am very pleased to be able to through this platform and you have a chance to get acquainted.
I can especially understand your feeling of enjoying the chase, but not wanting to continue after you've gotten there, which is actually quite common.
Hugs to you!
⭕️ In terms of psychological motivation, this condition can involve many things, such as a fascination with acquisition, or a desire to be noticed, etc.
At this stage, we tend to care more about our feelings, which may be realized through interactions with others. For example, the other person is not interested in us at first, and we realize our desire to be loved by trying to catch up with them. Once the motivation is satisfied and the goal is achieved, there may be little motivation to get along next.
△ In fact, your situation is reflected in many young people who may have separated love and life too much.
So we are not alone in this, we can all understand each other and cheer together oh.
⭕️ Especially as girls, we may be under more pressure.
Because after chasing the other person, they may complain that we cheated on our feelings, but we were following our heart, the positive side is that we took care of our feelings, chased them if we liked it, and let them go if we didn't like it. The negative side is that there may be some impact on the other person.
Of course, as girls, we inevitably hear complaints and even accusations from boys, so it can be a bit of a panic.
⭕️ So how do you fix it?
The fact that one or two such acts are no big deal shows that we are worthy of being loved. At the same time, there are no real benefits that come from this process, and we will eventually go back to being alone. Maybe we're not ready to talk about marriage yet, so it's important to protect ourselves in the process.
If you find that the other person is too committed, you should be careful to avoid bringing unnecessary trouble to yourself. Also, if we have to consider marriage in the future, I hope we can start from the reality of life and don't fall into an unsuitable marriage for the sake of fulfillment.
A lot of things we don't really have, even if the other person has liked us, don't mean anything. What we really need is to build confidence from within.
Way to go friend, and I'm rooting for you.
I hope my sharing brings you some warmth.
